facebook fad equals notification bad

I love how Facebook has become increasingly detailed.  Despite the fact that I cannot find friend requests and events I have been invited to, I love being kept extremely up to date on what everyone in my network is up to. For example: I just found out that Rachel Phaneuf is Esme Cullen from Twilight via "Which Twilight Character Are You?" app... First of all, who is that girl? Second, I totally thought she was more of a Rosalie, but obviously Facebook has the upper hand.

But I do love knowing about every little thing someone touches on that thing.  It's fascinating. 

So now I present to you the top 3 Facebook Things I Hate To Love.

3. Quizzes

I hate how many fucking times my news feed is overwhelmed by stupid quizzes from people I friended in 2004.  Megan, my roommate, has specifically voiced her opinions about quizzes to the masses with a status.  Ironically, the biggest perpetrator not only "liked" the status but commented, "I KNOW GIRRR... RIGHT?!" She had no idea that by taking the "Which David Bowie Persona Are You?" that poor Meg would have to scroll by it a million fucking times.  But, I love knowing that people take time out of their day to share that with me. 

2. Liking 

This is probably the funniest thing to happen to Facebook in recent months. I recently posted lyrics to a song and a buddy from way back "liked" my status.  I was flattered. But, what does it mean? Simply... you like whatever was posted, said, or shown.  "Kat Murphy likes this" is another way of commenting.  I can like that you posted a picture of someone deep throating a beer bottle because it's funny.  I can like that you quoted Dane Cook in your status.  Because I do, I like those things.  And I am going to let you know.  It is way easier than commenting "LOL girl. tht pic is whack." I just let you know that I like it.  Otherwise, I would have liked it silently.  On the other hand, as someone who has had things liked,  I don't think the word "like" describes the emotions that you feel as both the liker and the likee.  One question remains, where is not like?

1. Pages

WTF is pages?  I am pages with Boo from Monster's Inc, Topo Gigio, Bonfires, BBQs, Apple Students and The Old Man in the Mountain.  I have a friend who is pages with Walls.  I ask again WTF?! They are the stupidest/most fun thing to ever hit Facebook.  I love getting a notification that Jon has become pages with Hugs. You know you can become pages with Facebook? So, your Facebook page is pages with Facebook??? LOLWUT? Congrats Facebook.

There you go, the Top 3 Hate to Love Facebook Apps.  Go ahead, love them, no shame. Just know that I am watching you via Facebook News Feed. 

silent night, holy night.

We live in a generally quiet neighborhood.  During the day, there are people milling about.  Lots of strollers, people with dogs, etc.   There might be one or two cars that fly by to which we scream "This is a neighborhood" whilst shaking our fists in protest.  Oh, and one lady who lives directly across from us that never should have been a mother because her favorite past time is beating the hell out of her daughter with a flip flop and cursing.  But, I stand by the fact that it is generally quiet... during the day.

At night, however, there is a symphony of outrageous sounds. We have the typical sirens (both police and fire/emergency) and the pumping of reggaeton jams with basses that shake your bed.  Always some sort of large, hissing truck that picks up one garbage can and goes off into the night.  Just one!  There is usually some sort of domestic disturbance.  (Apparently if your husband turns off the tv while you are watching it, it is okay to alert the entire block.) I chalk these sounds up to normal city sounds.  There is one noise however, that defies all logic.

The previous summer we began to hear what is either a little child having night terrors, whining "noooooo" and crying, a girl who is having the time of her life while her boyfriend is going to town on her or a severely disturbed cat wandering the alleys.  We couldn't figure it out.  And it seemed to be coming from every direction.  

We were watching tv recently and heard it again.  With the weather getting nice and all it seemed logical it would begin again.  Unfortunately, this sound is not only very creepy, it is also intermittent and unpredictable.  Just as you are falling off to blissful slumber... "nooooooo.....nooooooo" begins.  And then it will stop for 20 minutes.... "noooooo".  It is mind numbing to lay there drifting in and out of consciousness wondering what the hell is lurking outside of your house.  

My question is, how will I ever know?  Dare I search the darkness for this stray cat?  Or peak voyeuristically into windows to see which lady neighbor is doing the kind of hug that makes babies? Or do I call all the parents on the block and tell their kids to shut up? Am I doomed to restless summer sleep? 

Does anyone know a good psychotherapist?